My God, my God,
have I forsaken You?
—fleeing from the cross,
nothing but my odious self within my sweaty hands,
thirsting after bitter pleasure,
running—blind—into the city,
where my undoing surely
will be finished?
Why would I continue to
refuse Your love—
the lesser agony of surrender—
for such a shattered state?
My God, my God,
have I forsaken You?
Lord, forgive me, forI knew not what I did.
One Sunday afternoon my siblings and I played a story game with some friends. Everyone wrote a sentence on a sheet of paper, folded it over, and passed it to the person next to them. Each person read only the previous sentence before adding one of their own to continue the story.
As the game progressed, there was no way of knowing what had been written that was now under numerous folds of paper. Sometimes we could add a next sentence right away, but more often we shook our heads or laughed. How to coherently take on someone else’s thought when we had no idea what the beginning was?
And even harder—how to write a satisfying ending? We took our best guesses and engaged our creativity.
When it came time to read the completed stories, everyone took a sheet and unrolled it to read to the rest. The varied handwriting and pen colors told the tale of a multi-authored story. Hearty laughter erupted at the odd—and mostly inadvertent—twists produced by the passing on of words and imagination from one person to another. Characters switched names halfway through, a windy hilltop became an ocean, a frog was banished to an insane asylum.
Amid the fun, I thought of a song I had listened to not long before: “If all things start and end with Him/ then we can believe / His word comes true.”
I have heard countless times that God is the Author and the Finisher of our faith. But suddenly I understood its significance more than ever before. He does not merely begin the story, then pass it off to us to do as we please with. Nor does He make us write the beginning and start stumbling about for a while before He steps in to complete the story with a nice stock ending.
Nothing of the sort will do for the beautiful stories God wants to write for our lives. He begins our stories with His own hand, a new beginning every time. He labors over the writing as only love can do. He walks us through the painful process of editing and shifting about of sentences. It is the same handwriting all through, sure and stately.
Granted, the story will most likely unfold with surprising plot twists. But it is God Himself who gives meaning to all the scenes. And it is God Himself who weaves the most profound and beautiful ending possible, opening out into the glory of His everlasting Kingdom.
Now is the only time there ever is to do a thing in.
Harriet Beecher Stowe
My two youngest brothers and I were nestled on the sofa one evening while I read Uncle Tom’s Cabin to them. This sentence spoken by the no-nonsense Miss Ophelia from Vermont made me stop and smile. So true.
I’ve become too good at procrastinating. I can dream and plan all I want for the future, but it’s what I do now that counts. Now is the acceptable time; now is the day of salvation. Jesus’ name Emmanuel means ‘God with us’. God with us now, this moment; He is I AM. And He can only work through us if we allow Him to use us wherever we happen to be in the present moment.
I’ve chosen now to launch this blog. You can expect to see inspirational meanderings, life updates, poems, photography, and quotes. Also, I’ve been working on writing a book about my great-grandmother’s life, and plan to post updates on that, especially when it becomes available to buy. I pray that the words shared here can encourage you in your own journey into His marvelous light.
Here is a brief overview of my life journey.
These are the people who mean the most in my life. My parents, Marvin and Amanda Weber, surrounded by their children, L-R, Rebecca (20), Jonathan (12), Jesse (16), Daniel (9), Adoniram (6), Caleb (14), Selema (21) and Judith (18).
I was born in an old farmhouse in Southern Ontario, my parents’ second child. In the meantime, I’ve lived in nine different houses, including old farmhouses, a crowded apartment in the city of Kitchener, and a 13-yr-old house on the shore of Lake Erie. In all these places and in different church communities, I’ve met different people. Many have become dear friends; all of them have shaped my life. I’m so grateful for the friendships that continue to this day, and for the new ones I get to cultivate today.
When I was almost nine years old, I heeded the call of the Lord to step out of darkness and into His marvelous light. Since then, He has been faithful to lead me through circumstances that draw me closer to Him. More and more, I desire to give Him all and to let His name be glorified through my life, even if it means dying to self. His Word is a light on my path. He has made me a partaker of eternal life. Glory to His name!
In 2015, my family moved to Nova Scotia. I have grown to love the hills and valleys of this province, the ocean never far away, and the friendly people. In the last few years, I have also grown to love the brothers and sisters of Bethel Mennonite Church, of which I am now a member.
For years I wanted to be a nurse. Working in a seniors’ home for a year fulfilled the desires of that dream. Currently I work as a special education teacher for one dear 9-yr-old boy from my church. It’s a stretching vocation, but so fulfilling.
There are so many stories I could tell, but they must wait. For now, let me say again: Welcome. Let’s journey together into His marvelous light. Today, and always.